Alyson Chadwick

Writer・Editor・Strategist・Comedian・Activist

The LIRR sucks (sometimes)

lirr sucks

I get why people complain about the LIRR

I grew up taking the LIRR into the city. It takes the exact same amount of time to get from Stony Brook to Penn Station today as it did when we moved to Long Island when I was about three years old. Seriously. In general, I like taking the train. I have probably driven into the city four or five times in my life. Maybe not even that. I hate driving into the city and there is no reason to do it with the train less than a mile from my house. I can see people in their cars and they all look like they are millimeters away from committing mass murder. Who wants to get that angry? Not me.

Yesterday was different. Part of a track on the Port Jefferson line (the only line they haven’t fully electrified) was broken and that happens but the confusion that ensued was nuts. We stopped on the track for a while and no one said anything. We just sat there. I had taken an earlier train so I could do some things in the city before I met someone but that time was eaten up sitting on the track. Finally, someone announced the problem and assured us that a train would be waiting to take us to Penn Station at Hicksville. When we got to that station, there was a train waiting but it was headed for Ronkonkoma. Not exactly where we were going. The LIRR staff member said a train was coming in 15 minutes, which was met with all the enthusiasm you can imagine. I am not the only inpatient New Yorker.

The good news is that person was wrong (surprise!) and a train came right after the Ronkonkoma train departed. But it was annoying. Things break, we all get that but get your shit together, LIRR.

Then on the way home, there was some issue. We were about nine minutes late getting to Huntington (maybe the same track issue?) and then once we were at Huntington, we all had to wait until the train we were on left. For some reason, this took about 15 minutes. We kept seeing people walk up and down in the train we had just exited. What the hell were they doing? No idea but it was super cold on the platform and no one was happy.

It seems the Port Jefferson line is the red-headed stepchild of the LIRR system. I don’t get it. Stony Brook University is often called the flagship school of the SUNY system (the largest public university system in the country) and it sits on the Port Jeff line. Why not make it easier for people to get to and from this university? I get that Stony Brook, the town, has mixed feelings about the university (across the street from the university is a sign, “Welcome to Stony Brook! Home of the Stony Brook School!” — that school is a private school housed in the middle of the Three Village School District, which is a great school district, but I digress) but shouldn’t everyone see the benefit in improving this line? WTF?

I am hosting a show!

If you are in the Mt. Sinai area on December 10, you will be able to come see me host a show! How awesome is that? Very! Check it out!